Lay eggs, much?

The voyeur is trying something new.  I am actually blogging while I watch.  Revolutionary, I know.

As I type, my husband is playing Modern Warfare 3 with both the TV audio and his headphones on.  I have been told that, yes, he is also listening to the game through the headphones and that, yes, he knows how silly this must seem. 

I like watching the game more than Battlefield 3, but probably only because I am familiar with the Call of Duty family of games.  Can I refer to a series of games as a family?  Or is that too domestic of me?  I will try to turn down the estrogen just a bit.  This is a very manly moment after all.

I will try to talk to my husband anyway:

So, honey, why are you listening to the game in this seemingly redundant way?
well, so...so, you...you can hear the game some.  I don't want you to be completely left out.  And, then uh, plus, uh I can turn it on as loud as...as I want.  <geeked out grin>

Is it difficult for you to talk to me and play at the same time?
<shakes head, lifts one headphone off ear a tiny bit>
I'll probably turn it down some.  (does not turn it down.  I step away.)

Hmm, I have just returned to the video game viewing room and it seems my husband is now playing Skyrim.  In the time that it took me to clear my dinner dishes (leftover barbeque chicken, raw broccoli with ranch dressing and cheetos...do I know how to rock the five food groups or what?) he has switched over to roll playing game mode.  The headphones are neatly holstered and his feet are up on the couch.  Roll playing games such as Skyrim do not require the intense video game playing position.  Did he dim the lights??

Furthermore, what is a Skyrim any way?  It sounds like a step below the mile high club. 

So, as I have intimated, there is a lot of video gaming going on 'round here.  'Tis the season.  Battlefield 3, Modern Warfare 3, Arkham City, and Skyrim have all graced our console this week with the new Saints Row on its way, stay tuned.  I can't say that I mind especially after that stupid game my stupid Ravens just played.

Don't get me wrong, I am no hater.  I am still a true fan.  But, if a cheeseburger makes me throw up I have the right to call it a stupid cheeseburger no matter how faithful I am to cheeseburgers.  Can I get an amen? 

Preach it, brother

The Battlefield fans are restless.  I believe it bothers them deeply that I have my doubts.  One particular friend of mine, who I will refer to as snowjumpstump (SJS), was moved to message me, 

"i think you and i should have a sit down
about the merits of battlefield bad company 2 
and why that game has helped shape battlefield 3

and how AWESOME it's going to be!"

You have to admire his conviction.  I just can't get into watching games like this, Call of Duty, etc. 

Our conversation went on to conjure up the idea of me watching him and his buddies play.  Surely, I would then be converted.  An added bonus: I could see a PS3 perform and finally decide to buy one for the hubs.   

This was exciting.  I was being wooed by another.  But then, wouldn't it be cheating if I watched another man play?  SJS is a happily married AVG (avid video gamer) to a beautiful VGV (video game voyeur) of his own.  Even in the name of Battlefield one would have to be mad to belittle such bliss.

We came to our senses.  SJS would simply bring his PS3 to my place.  He would play with my husband, therefore making it fully acceptable for me to watch.  Kinky...

In seriousness, the challenge is on.  SJS has proclaimed his mission to bring me to Battlefield.  I appreciate his concern for my voyeuristic soul.  Really, I think he just wants to convince me to buy my husband a PS3 and BF3 so they can play online.

The new game launches in 102 days.  Fellow fans: start praying.

Hear me meow

I had a lovely holiday weekend at home.  One of the nights, my husband grilled a succulent salmon for our dinner.  He chilled white wine and brought the laptop to the table to play some music.  Soon after we finished eating he pulled up an online list of the best upcoming 360 games.  How romantic.

I suppose it was thoughtful of him to give me the heads up on what I will be watching (and you will be reading).  He thought I might need blog fodder.  Blog fodder.  That sounds naughty...or Irish.  I'll blog your fodder.

Anyway, here is a recap of our "intimate" dinner conversation:

Gears of War 3 is coming out in September.  All I remember about the previous game is the chainsaw gun.  Time to "gear" up for some more quality hacking.

As I mentioned in a previous post, Battlefield 3 will be launching soon.  I'll reluctantly give it a chance.  Maybe the dudes in this game will have better butts than the competition.  

Saints Row: The Third is certain to hit my house in early January.  Helping my husband skank out his female figure (he often plays as a girl...more on this in a future post) equals Happy New Years to me.

Other games I am sure I will watch include: Mass Effect 3, BioShock Infinite and Assassin's Creed Revelations.  I particularly like watching Assassin's Creed, but since the current game just made my husband grumble, "what do these people want from me?" I am assuming this one might be further down on his mental gotta game list.

Finally, and really all of this to say, Batman: Arkham City is coming out in just a few short months.  We women typically turn to Cosmo or People to discover how to lure a man.  We have been sorely misguided.  What a man wants is Catwoman.  I intend to live vicariously through her.  I invite you to join me.  Hear me meow.

 

We're gonna have a good time

My birthday is coming up and I am throwing myself a big party.  Call me old fashioned, but we will neither play nor watch any video games at this gathering.  I believe we will still manage to have some fun.

My husband's birthday is coming up in a few months.  We will not be throwing him a big party so I want to be sure to mark the occasion appropriately.  Brainstorming has begun.

I know something he would really like: a PS3.

His console coveting has slowed down.  He waited in line all night to buy a PS2.  He drove all around Baltimore to find a Game Cube the day after it launched.  He nearly froze to death at the midnight release for the Wii.  He settled on a 360 after the second time around.  But he has only ever talked about a PS3.

Now, despite my "involvement" with video games I have never bought my husband anything video game related.  It is a line I have chosen not to cross.  It works for us.  However, I am willing to cross that line to ensure my husband's fourth decade is more pleasurable than his third.  The dilemma I am really facing is that if he owns a PS3 it pretty much guarantees he will play Battlefield 3.  

I just can't get into watching these schizophrenic, sensory overload, run around and shoot like its a penny a round, first person shooters.  I hide my face behind my Real Simple.  Bathing to Black Ops is not relaxing.  I long for simpler, quieter times.  I miss Rainbow Six Vegas 2.

I would lie on the couch, curled behind my husband.  I would wear the headset.  Not only did I get to bark orders to our friends, I got the dish on their new girlfriends.  I had a purpose.  I was comfortable.

So, I don't know.  I am just glad my husband also plays games like Puzzle Quest.  If he wants a PS3 as much as I think he does perhaps I will break down and buy it for him.  BF3 is coming out for the 360 anyway.  Maybe love is Battlefield.